Jokes

Jokes > Animals

Animals

Animals are a part of nature and in these jokes you'll see mother nature has a great sense of humour.

4.2
A DEA officer stopped at our farm yesterday "I need to inspect your farm for illegal growing drugs." I said "Okay, but don't go in...
2.909525
Judge: Look here Mickey Mouse, I cannot grant you a divorce from Minnie. Mickey (stunned): Why not? Judge: I have reviewed all the...
4.253335
A man wants to buy some farm animals so he goes over to a store and asks the clerk for a rooster. The clerk gives him the rooster and...
2.582145
Two hunters are out in the wild hunting, when out of nowhere, one of the hunters falls to the ground. The other hunter checks if he's...
3
Johnny went hunting one day in Ontario and bagged three ducks. He put them in the bed of his pickup truck and was about to drive home...
3.125
A guy was standing in front of the gorilla cage at the zoo one day, when a gust of wind swept some dust into his eye. As he rubbed...
3.75
In the middle of a forest, there was a hunter who was suddenly confronted by a huge, mean bear.In his fear, all attempts to shoot the...
3.35
Paddy and his wife are lying in bed one night and the neighbours dog is barking. Paddy says fuck this and storms off downstairs. 5...
3.5
A big Texan cowboy stopped at a local restaurant following a day of drinking and roaming around in Mexico. While sipping his tequila...
3
Three tortoises, Mick, Alan and Les, decide to go on a picnic. So Mick packs the picnic basket with beer and sandwiches. The trouble...
4
A man wants to buy a pet for his girlfriend for Christmas, so he goes to a pet shop..."Hello, I was thinking of buying a pet for my...
2.5
The only cow in a small Kentucky town stopped giving milk. The people did some research and found that they could buy a cow just...
3.333335
Three men are stranded on an island so they decide to go exploring. They come across a tribe of cannibals so they chief cannibal says...
4.666665
A little farm boy was walking to the school bus one morning when he began kicking farm animals. First he kicked a pig. Then he kicked...
1.75
A guy has a horny parrot. It's terrible. Every time he reaches into the cage, the bird humps his arm. He invites his mother to tea,...
5
A Panda Bear walks into a cafá and orders a sandwich and a drink. After he is finished eating, the waiter comes over to bring him the...
0
A lion, a gorilla and a chicken are talking in a pub. Then they begin boasting. The lion says, "I'm the King of the Jungle because...
1
Panda In order to punish your cat for poor behavior, here are a list of items that the cat may write on a chalkboard. A. Fill in the...
3
Panda Two morons stand on a cliff with their arms outstretched. One has some budgies lined up on each arm, the other has parrots...
2
Panda I went to the cinema the other day and in the front row was an old man and with him was his dog. It was a sad funny kind of...

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